The Garden at Bag End

It wasn't really as idyllic as depicted by Tolkien. Sam often had to resort
to a flamethrower and hand grenades to keep it under control. On one
occasion the foulgrass became so troublesome that he even imported, at his
own cost, some of the fearsome sickletoothed grass voles from Harad.
However, the sickletoothed voles rebelled and consumed all of Sam's
siblings. (Did you really think he was an only child?) Sam managed to fight
them back with mustard gas, a tommy gun and a wheelbarrowload of posioned
honey, but then they made a last stand in the potting shed and he had to use
a little aromic bomb to eliminate them.
After that, the hobbits of the Hill became known as "the poofs" or "the
smellie-wellies". The aromatic smell of voles suffocated by honey gas
wouldn't go away.

At midnight I stop and test the air,
And feel the pong; I do declare:
You may get the vole out of the shed,
But you'll never get rid of the scent you spread.

Öjevind