Laying the groundwork for further discussion

Pseudonymus al-Faqha'ter III wrote:
> It seems only proper that we establish what will be considered
> acceptable Canon to use in discussing Tolkien. Unfortunately,
> canonicity has been given a bit short shrift.
>
> Certain works are obviously Canon: the Book of Unanswered Questions
> (edited by MORAMBAR:-)), the Wanderings of Blogambar, and the Tolkien-
> MORAMBAR correspondence. We at FATS are also at work on a true History
> of MIddle-earth in a hundred or so vlumes.
>
> It goes without saying that none of the books edited by Christopher
> Tolkien cannot be used as canon. Works like Lord of the Rings are abit
> trickier; it is known that Christopher forced Tolkien at gunpoint to
> alter parts of it, but evidence suggests this was limited to leaving
> parts out, so that we may still view LOTR as canonical, though
> incomplete.

Our latest research goes even deeper then this. We have found strong
indications that in some ocassions Tolkien HIMSELF misunderstood his own
thoughts! In light of this groundbreaking discovery we may have to
revaluate even more of our fundamental understanding of canonicity then
we had believed. A complete REconstructional disection of ALL Tolkien's
works might be necessary. THIS is the Ultimate Purpose of FATS! We will
not fail. Join us now!!

Morambar the Decider
UTSO and STEA
 >> Stay informed about: Laying the groundwork for further discussion 

Noel Q. von Schneiffel wrote:
> On 29 Okt., 02:34, Morambar <moram... DeleteThis @fats.teunc.org> wrote:

>>Our latest research goes even deeper then this. We have found strong
>>indications that in some ocassions Tolkien HIMSELF misunderstood his own
>>thoughts!
>
>
> I thank you, Master, for this test of my loyalty. However, I intend to
> pass it. I insist that Tolkien made no such errors.

YOU DARE QUESTION *ME*??!!!

Which is good because FATS is all about open and indiscriminating
discussion between differing viewpoints and opinnions, and none should
fear to speak up their mind openly and without restrictions or
reprecussions.

We shall continue with this issue on Friday's Faculty meeting. To make
sure you can give your undivided attention for preparing your retort, I
have cancelled your lectures for this week. Your students will report to
exercises of penance and obedience.

Tolerance, Humanism and Overall Niceness - these are the Foundation
Bricks of FATS.

Morambar
the Supreme Decider and Overlord of FATS
 >> Stay informed about: Laying the groundwork for further discussion 

On Oct 29, 5:17 am, Morambar <moram....DeleteThis@fats.teunc.org> wrote:
> Noel Q. von Schneiffel wrote:
>
> > On 29 Okt., 02:34, Morambar <moram....DeleteThis@fats.teunc.org> wrote:
> >>Our latest research goes even deeper then this. We have found strong
> >>indications that in some ocassions Tolkien HIMSELF misunderstood his own
> >>thoughts!

Thy wonders know no limit. Thou comprehendest yet more of Tolkien's
mind than Tolkien Himself!

What fabulous discoveries will be ours now! And, one hopes, profitable
ones that will make us globs of moolah.

> We shall continue with this issue on Friday's Faculty meeting. To make
> sure you can give your undivided attention for preparing your retort, I
> have cancelled your lectures for this week. Your students will report to
> exercises of penance and obedience.

Thou art indeed just, Great One. Canst Thou also deal with Horus
Engels? He never ceases to snipe at Thy unworthy servant (me) in the
newsgroups, and his department is, frankly, a drain on the budget.
 >> Stay informed about: Laying the groundwork for further discussion 

On 29 Okt., 10:17, Morambar <moram....TakeThisOut@fats.teunc.org> wrote:
>
> We shall continue with this issue on Friday's Faculty meeting. To make
> sure you can give your undivided attention for preparing your retort, I
> have cancelled your lectures for this week. Your students will report to
> exercises of penance and obedience.

Oh, thank you, Master! Would you also like to whip me a bit? That
would be very kind of you. I whip my own back on Wednesday afternoon,
to exercise my modesty, but lately the arm movement strains my
shoulder rather painfully. Alas, none of us is getting younger!

Thank you for giving me so much time to prepare. Given my tight
schedule, I was not sure whether I could prepare more than three hours
of speech, but now I'll be easily able to give a twelve- or fourteen-
hours introduction on that matter. Pseudonymus, please make sure there
is enough coffee, so that nobody nods off. After this introduction, I
thought we might have a very short discussion of no more than six or
seven hours, before I do the extremely abbreviated sum-up of no more
than four hours. I thought it would be a nice touch if we had four or
five breaks during the whole thing, ten minutes maybe, where we all
just recite parts of the Lay of Leithian together, to loosen up the
mood and brains. This might add another hour to the schedule, but my
experience is that it really brings new fervor to the meeting.

See you on Friday,
Noel
 >> Stay informed about: Laying the groundwork for further discussion 

On 29 Okt., 20:56, Pseudonymus al-Faqha'ter III
<pseudonimofaqha....DeleteThis@yahoo.com.br> wrote:
>
> Thou art indeed just, Great One. Canst Thou also deal with Horus
> Engels? He never ceases to snipe at Thy unworthy servant (me) in the
> newsgroups, and his department is, frankly, a drain on the budget.

Pseudonymus, I don't know how you economy guys calculate, but that
can't be. I personally bought 300 copies of Horus' newest book,
"Commentaries on the Numbers of Warg Molars", a 3500-page masterwork
written entirely in Linear A on wind-dried papyrus, as christmas
presents for my relatives! If that didn't prop up the budget, there's
something seriously wrong.

Have you funnelled off money again for your personal purposes? If that
is true, I certainly don't want to be in your shoes... I mean,
tentacle-warmers... when Morambar finds out.

Noel
 >> Stay informed about: Laying the groundwork for further discussion 

On Oct 29, 4:47 pm, "Noel Q. von Schneiffel" <sheepofst... RemoveThis @freenet.de>
wrote:
> On 29 Okt., 10:17, Morambar <moram... RemoveThis @fats.teunc.org> wrote:
>
>
>
> > We shall continue with this issue on Friday's Faculty meeting. To make
> > sure you can give your undivided attention for preparing your retort, I
> > have cancelled your lectures for this week. Your students will report to
> > exercises of penance and obedience.
>
> Oh, thank you, Master! Would you also like to whip me a bit? That
> would be very kind of you. I whip my own back on Wednesday afternoon,
> to exercise my modesty, but lately the arm movement strains my
> shoulder rather painfully. Alas, none of us is getting younger!
>
> Thank you for giving me so much time to prepare. Given my tight
> schedule, I was not sure whether I could prepare more than three hours
> of speech, but now I'll be easily able to give a twelve- or fourteen-
> hours introduction on that matter. Pseudonymus, please make sure there
> is enough coffee, so that nobody nods off.

Etc., etc., etc.

MORAMBAR will set the agenda, not you. Who do you think you are? Do
you think the Academy has all day to listen to you? Some of us are
trying to do important research into Middle-earth, you know. For
example, what was the geodesic density of Mordor?

And: *you* can serve the coffee. It had better be good. Tolkien
insisted on almond mocha, and once threatened Edith with divorce when
she served caffè americano.

Please buy these humility pills for $999.99.
 >> Stay informed about: Laying the groundwork for further discussion